Things I trust more than Patrick Reed’s golf scores:
- Bill Cosby bartending
- Michael Vick dog sitting
- Flint Michigan’s tap water
- Casey Anthony babysitting
- Gas station sushi
Patrick Reed’s reputation for being honest
Before we begin, let’s review what Patrick Reed has done on the PGA Tour that we know about and can prove:
- Farmers Insurance Open – January 2021: While it was not proven Reed cheated, he put himself in another questionable situation. He picked up his ball on the 3rd day of the tournament before consulting rules officials. Then he spent time “with his fingers in the deep rough” around his ball. While Reed didn’t break any rules and followed protocol, he definitely should be more conscientious of his sketchy behaviors.
- Hero World Challenge – 2019: “Sandygate” where Reed was issued a 2-stroke penalty after TV officials caught him improving his lie in a sand bunker. Koepka chirped him the best saying he was “building castles in the sand”.
- College – 2010-11: Reed’s cheating reputation goes all the way back to his college days when he was accused of cheating in team qualifying tournaments. He was dismissed from UGA and went to Augusta State because other collegiate golfers at UGA accused him of “cheating and stealing from teammates”.
Conspiracy Theory:
Now on to part 2 of my story, Bryson DeChambeau had to withdraw from the USA Olympic Golf Team after testing positive for Covid-19 over the weekend.
Where am I going with this you may ask? If Reed is known to cheat and not get along with fellow golfers dating back to his college days, who would not put it in the realm of possibilities that he gave super douche, Bryson DeChambeau, Covid?
Maybe he followed the Tonya Harding playbook and instead of a using a police baton, he used Covid? Reed is a win at all cost, “play by my own rules”, and “I am above the law” type guy. Would this be too farfetched?
Especially if he is picking a target that has as bad of a reputation as him in the golf world. If he was to go after a guy like Phil and give Lefty Covid, it would be one thing. But no one would really care seeing Captain Protein Shake miss the Olympics.
Let’s review the 3 things that put Patrick Reed on my suspicious list:
- Motivation – Patrick Reed wants to be on the USA Olympic Golf Team
- Opportunity – He was an alternate and next in line should any player be unable to attend. Plus, DeChambeau is not well liked by fans, other golfers, or even his sponsors. No one would care if he missed out on anything.
- Ability – Covid is everywhere and Rahm just tested positive. He could have either gotten someone to give DoucheChambeau Covid or paid someone to “fix” a test
While this is a bit of a stretch, I could see it coming out in a few years that Reed was involved and this is all a giant conspiracy theory.
I trust Patrick Reed the same way I would a fart after 2 cups of coffee and a breakfast burrito!
